Tuesday, October 27, 2009

twitter review: the andromeda strain

and now that sick is done reviews are back -- tonight's feature is the andromeda strain. on VHS!
"The documents presented here are soon to be made public. They do not compromise national security in any way."
TODF keyword: disclaimer at beginning of film. *love* that.
douglas trumbull on special photographic effects. always a good sign.
gil melle' did the score! what was i thinking? and it's beautiful, super-bloopy syntho action.
"I didn't know buzzards fly at night!"
if you have an itch for vintage gear porn, this movie is the *business*.
"We see bodies. Lots of 'em."
if you're up for a serious '70s style paranoid speedball trip, again, it's the business.
also, you've been placed on zed kappa status. DISENGAGE!
split lens! hooray!
look, if you're the sort of dude who gets called on by army dudes you need a wife who can roll with that.
"This communication is being monitored. The connection has been broken for reasons of national security." that's my new voicemail message!
if you want to understand what the deal is with america and health care, watch this movie. or read any crichton book.
i'm going to spare you the agonizing dialogue. you're welcome.
actually, i can't, it's too choice: "What a world we've made. I can see why the kids are dropping out."
holy shit! electricity freakout!
also, i kinda want to set up kara-bakos south like the wildfire compound.
all the walls painted red! red and chrome! and red jumpsuits!
man, crichton loves the odd man hypothesis.
this is a good example of "movies that would be video games only video games weren't invented yet".
in related news, the laundry system here at Baulernetics will be a five-level nexus of puzzles and physical challenges.
i'm adding "body analyzer" to my list of credentials.
as a movie, the andromeda strain fails completely. as psychedelic freakout, however, it's nice!
i'm just cranky because there's no naked lesbian vampires or anything. it's all policy wonks!
the poor monkey! that's terrible!
"I wish you would sweat a little more. Sweat is a safeguard against certain kinds of bacteria."
i swear, i couldn't make this stuff up.
the poor rat!
science is about killing things.
"That's what we'll find out now. The mechanism of death."
the growth of the spore scenes? super-trippy.
this would be a perfect double feature with christmas on mars.
the only thing that will save you from space germs is drinking sterno!
"They should have dropped the bomb!"
Ladies and gentlemen, The Germ People.
a virus from space that eats plastic! of course!
i really need to get a copy of the score for this. it's modularific!
then again, i know people who liked ER, so who knows.
"She's got the germ!"
man, would i love a loop of the final scene of this move.
the andromeda strain is perhaps the perfect combination of awesome and stupid. Well, more stupid than awesome, but still, VHS is the best way to see it.
and now, to the library! GOOD NIGHT AMSTERDAM!

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